We have different love languages but analyze: is that the real problem? Map love languages: are we actually speaking different languages or is one person just not trying? Calculate: effort given vs. love language excuse vs. actual incompatibility. Show me the love language trap: using it to excuse not meeting partner's needs. Give me the reality: this is love language mismatch, this is lack of effort. Include: whether love languages explain the issue or excuse it, if we're both trying, and whether this is fixable.